I usually post about films and pop culture and occasionally about the rad white water rafting I did on holiday, but I hardly ever post about my love of knitting and cake and rompers (or playsuits, or onesies for those of you confused by my terminology). Mostly because these things don't really inspire me to post all that much, and this is my blog so I will fill it with rants about shit 3D conversion and the overexposure of Eliza Dushku's rear in Dollhouse because that's what makes me reach for my keyboard. However, I do love those things. I like pink (you may have noticed that my blog is pink themed) and I like wearing Converse with skirts, and buying jewellery from Etsy.
Why am I telling you this? Because according to
Julie Klausner this means I am failing the sisterhood.
Above - a kitten and a pair of Converse. Doesn't mean I want you to infantilise me.
In her blog post, Julie rails against women who are, according to her, increasingly acting like little girls. She thinks it's because we want men to think we're sweet and inoffensive, and that we're trying to live up to some weird needy babyish vision of the perfect woman.
Yep, I'd agree there's a definite trend for cutesy, girly stuff for women at the moment. Some of it I like and some of it I don't. I get upset when it's foisted on to children as the only choice for a little girl (
see the recent Twitter campaign against Tesco's "zones" for boys and girls). For adults, however, it is a choice and should be respected as such.
Basically, fuck off telling me what I should and shouldn't like.
Fuck off with the "you only like this stuff because (insert reason) and women should like (insert item)". I like what I like. I don't live in a blinkered bubble where I think I make all my choices free from external pressure, and I appreciate that bloggers want to highlight what they consider to be a growing pressure on women to choose things that make them seem childish and inoffensive, but really, fuck off. You might think Etsy and Converse and rompers and knitting makes me a women playing at being a little girl. I think I find crafts soothing, even if I can't afford to buy in to the expensive luxury end of the knitting scene. You might think buying things from Etsy is childish, but I think I can't afford real, non-costume jewellery and so Etsy is a place to get something nice and not cheaply mass-produced from Topshit. You might think my Converse makes me a permanent tweenager, but I think they're comfier than high heels.
I would challenge the idea that most women who like this cutesy stuff don't also read things written before they were born (thanks, Julie, that's super patronising), or share a glass of wine with their friends. Perhaps I'm wrong, but so what? We're all different, and that's okay. This version of womanhood is just as fake and just as bullshit, and I hate that reading that blog post has made me feel the need to justify myself but saying that, hey, I also know how to rewire a plug and change a fuse, and I read Kafka for fun, and I drink wine with my friends.
I also think Julie's post confuses fluffy femininity with childishness (hence the clash of bunnies and baking with trainers and Xbox). To define these concepts by items of clothing and hobbies is ridiculous. None of these things are inherently childish or feminine, but how they are experienced can make them so, and different people will have different definitions of what isn't age-appropriate behaviour.
God, I even hate the term "age-appropriate" in this sense. It seems a little bit too much like "mutton dressed as lamb" and other woman-on-woman hate phrases.
Yes, it's frustrating when women put themselves in a position to be patronised and belittled and have their power leached away because they choose to be babied. It has nothing to do with how they choose to dress or spend their spare time. Hell, in my eyes one of the worst offenders in TV history was Carrie in Sex And The City, who used to love it when Big called her "kid" and patronised her, and she didn't dress like a little girl as far as I can remember. If you want to criticise this behaviour, then believe me I understand the urge, but perhaps don't be so short-sighted as to blame it on a woman's choice of outfit?
There's a
far more interesting look at the childish/feminine trend over here at the Ch!cktionary, which manages not to bash women who DO like things considered to be very feminine, whilst considering why women make these choices.
I should also add that despite the fact that I disagreed with Julie Klausner's post so much that I wrote my very own rant, I do want to read her book. Hey, just because I disagreed with her on this one thing!
